Being in a relationship with mySELF

Okay, I know that the title of this post is kind of cliche, but I’m going to write about it because this is me having my aha! moment.  I suppose there is a touch of the whole “Eat, Pray, Love” thing (though I haven’t actually read it) but bear with me.

When I was in elementary school I was queen bee; the boys liked me, the girls wanted to be my friend, I was smart (and made exceptional grades) and basically was just all around “living the life” (though as I’m writing this, I realize that sounds kind of sad).  When I was 12, however, my family and I moved to another city and everything kind of turned around.  I’m 98% positive that my anxiety kicked in at that age because of hormones and the like but basically I became this shy little 12 year old in a completely alien setting.

 I was fiercely passionate about being my own individual self but there was also always a part of me that wanted to be popular again.  In my particular school that essentially meant doing things like going to the tanning bed, having a boyfriend (of course), going to parties, having parents that didn’t care what I did and basically acting a lot older than I really was.  Even since going to college there has still been a part of me that wants to live the elite southern socialite life; going to swanky country clubs and luncheons, having a wealthy husband (I know, my inner feminist is cringing), and generally not having a care in the world (especially financial)…

I recently posted about this book I’m reading by SARK, “Make Your Creative Dreams Real.”  This books has just motivated me so so much to work on figuring out what I want (not what I think other people would like me for).  And that is where being “in a relationship” with myself comes in.  Instead of focusing on finding a boyfriend, I want to seek my own dreams and be my own person.  After all, you always hear that a relationship can’t work if you aren’t happy with yourself.  

So, this is another one of my goals: to stop focusing on other people’s view of me (particularly the opposite sex) and focus on my own fulfillment and purpose.  It’s going to be difficult– I mean I will literally have to change the way I think.  But hey, making a goal is the first step, right?

Inspiration and motivation, courtesy of SARK!

I am writing my latest post to talk about this fantastical experience I am having right now: reading SARK’s book, “Make Your Creative Dreams Real.”

I’d heard about SARK before from one of my childhood friend’s mother who also happens to be a great role model of mine.  As it turns out, she used to work with the current Dean of the school that I go to and that dean told her about SARK who is this majestic and intensely creative author and artist.   I saw and liked her work but never got around to getting one of her many books.

I had no idea that my dear sister had purchased (or been given) one of SARK’s books.  I found it over the weekend and to my surprise and joy, I realized that Emily (my sister) had written in it!  So as I am reading it, I am making notes as well about my own creative dreams.  Eventually I’ll pass it around to the rest of my family who will do the same and we will compare notes at the end!

(Side note: In case you don’t know, Emily died about a year ago from brain cancer.  I found the book while going through some of her old things, so as I’m sure you can imagine, it’s nice to have a little piece of her.  Especially in the form of her written dreams. )

On to the creative part of the story: This book is just a great motivator and supporter of not only creative dreams but life goals in general.  I am so inspired by it! There is a section about thinking positively instead of negatively and even with a couple of days of reading it, I already feel it at work in my life.

Tonight I was flipping through channels while making a few notes in the book and happened to come across a channel that was airing an old episode of “Full House.”  In this particular episode, Danny and DJ are trying their hand at dating, which proves to be more difficult than expected.  In the end (you know, the cheesy part with the sappy music), Danny describes to Michelle that he and DJ ended up having a fun night because they made up their minds to, not because it just magically happened.

I then flipped to another channel which was playing Maya Rudolph’s new variety show where I was reminded of the creativity of so many talented comedians coming together to help Maya pursue her creative dream.

I can’t wait to write more about the book and topics in it; right now I’m trying to organize all my thoughts about the many subjects it covers.  I also want to seek out some people to discuss it with because it is something I am deeply passionate about (creativity, that is… and pursuing one’s dreams)!!  Essentially I am just so motivated and inspired right now because of this book and it is a spectacular feeling!!

 

PS If you’ve read SARK’s books and have had a similar experience, please feel free to contact me (let me know in the comments)! I would love to connect over this experience.  I think there are opportunities to connect via her website as well… which is where I’m headed next! 😉